Hi all

Bubs is now 7.5 months corrected (9.5 mths actual). We are now starting to take him out a bit but its not that easy as he tends to like his sleep lots!!!

He is having 3 naps a day of around 1 hour to 2 hours - in total around 4 hours of actual sleeping. He shows tired signs after 1 to 1.5 hours so by the time he's been fed, then nappy done (sometimes twice if there's some poo action), change of clothes after solids etc etc it is hard to find any time to actually go out!!!

Anyway - wonder if older prems do tend to get tired quicker (I know little ones do) or if it's just him - or something I should be worrying about like low iron or something?? (He's on two solids which includes meat, baby rice with iron, vit c sources - plus formula which also has iron - not showing lethargy etc) Maybe just him?

Hi v.girl. I understand premies do tend to get more tired but every baby is so different, so its hard to make a judgement about your wee one. Sounds like your wee man is eating and doing well so Im sure he is fine. Maybe talk to your Paediatrician if you are worried...

Ive found that our baby has changed in the past 6 weeks from needing lots of sleep - 3-5 hours a day, to some days only managing 1 or 2 hours. This has coincided with a huge developmental change. She has blossomed in the past few weeks both socially and physically and seems to need less sleep. She is also able to cope more with stimulation from others now.

Many people dont understand how a premie's needs are different to normal babies. Only now, at 11 months (9 adjusted) am I starting to relax and take her out to do things that others have been doing for months. I am very proud though, that we have managed to get through the year without any coughs or colds and Im sure thats because she wasnt exposed to other children. My wee girl was ventilated for 5 days at birth so we had real concerns about chronic lung disease and were warned against illness in the first year.

Its hard getting out when your baby need so much sleep. Does he sleep in the buggy? I go for a walk until she is asleep and organise to meet friends at the end of the walk for a coffee and (hopefully) she stays asleep. Of course easier said than done especially if getting out involves a car ride, shifting baby from car seat to buggy, then noisy cafe.

See if anyone else has any advice for you.

Thanks Milo9. So glad to hear how well your girl is doing :-)

I am thinking he is just a baby who needs more sleep than others who are full term of the same corrected age. I always worry about everything though but he seems well and is gaining weight nicely etc and is happy when awake etc so all good really.

It is good that I am happy playing housewife and mummy - and will go out in the weekend without bubs and hubby in tow so bubs can get his naps. Probably in a few months will be able to get out a bit more as a family.

I think what I find hardest is others who say you need to take him out for his own social stimulation, or who imply I'm being overly protective or that he needs to get sick for his immune system to be strengthened - arggghhhh! Or who say that he looks just like a full termer now so must be fine!

He also hasn't been sick at all and also would be because he hasn't been exposed to others much at all. - I would prefer to keep him well as long as I can possibly can while also retaining my sanity.

I think for now will stick to walks in the buggy (too far to walk to shops or cafes) but still nice to get some fresh air. And will look at some outings in a few months. - By the time it's winter again I think we will hibernate a bit again as don't want him catching something nasty over winter. (Plus nice to stay in winter anyway!(

Anyway thanks for replying and it's nice to hear that things will change. (I need to remind myself of that as of course he does sleep a lot less than he used to and life is much easier than it has been!) Thank you :-)

My premmie is 4 now, and I still find he needs lots of sleep, and we have some concerns about his lung capacity, which has always been his weakness.

I found about 13 mths when I got him down to 2 sleeps a day, that we could do things mid morning and late afternoon.

I really don't know if the sleep thing is just him and how he was going to be or because of the prem, but I thought I'd comment as most of what you said is what I went through.

Hope that helps, not too long to go

Hi again. I agree its frustrating when others tell you your baby is fine and should be out there being stimulated. In my inexperienced opinion I think that it is the parents who want and need the stimulation and the babies are just as happy at home. Especially premies who need the care and protection. You are doing the right thing in my opinion. Some people dont have the choice esp with older siblings or having to work, but if you can, you should stay nice and quiet for as long as possible. As a baby I lived on a farm and my mother never took me anywhere, never had kindy or anything until school, and I believe I had a pretty good childhood.

I've been trying to remember with W (he was my earliest at 33 weeks) and back then we didn't HAVE to go out to anything.

Honestly I think their neurological system takes longer to mature and they learn more slowly how to manage and moderate all those sensory experiences. So it takes them more energy to just keep it all together and not be so overwhelmed, so they tire more easily. It's like getting tired with just sucking and swallowing and taking time to co-ordinate the breathe as well when they are learning to feed.

Granted W was later diagnosed with sensory intergration issues but he'd just shut down and show signs of stress when it was too noisy, too bright, too many people or too much handling. Often his shut down looked like sleep but there were differences if you knew him.

As for infections/exposure to people - I'm sure I've told you about my older two. W was born in the middle of winter and we were incredibly careful with him, limited exposure etc. He got his first bug aged around 7 months old but we had taken him overseas during a Northern Hemisphere winter - he hadn't even scored a summer yet!!

N was born 3 weeks later than W and in the middle of summer so while I was careful I wasn't as paranoid as I was with W. W was at playgroup and Early Intervention by that point anyway so I couldn't totally protect him anyway.
N got bug after bug which really knocked him around his first winter but the worst was, because against my better judgement, I allowed a sick relative to visit us. N was 6 months old, caught her chest infection as well as developing croup and wound up in ICU and nearly on a vent. We were told we were incredibly lucky not to lose him with that infection. He had 6 days on O2 and ping ponged between the ward and ICU twice.
After that neither DH or I relaxed about buggy people!
Limiting exposure as much as we could from then on meant much better health for N, better weight gains and more energy for him to keep working on his development.

Immune systems can be 'strengthened' any time but development time is important and sometimes these kids can't manage both!

Thanks guys :-) Really appreciate that - so nice to hear fromn people who really get it!

Think we will stick to the quiet life for a bit longer - and ignore people who don't know what they are talking about!

Thanks again :-)